Joseph Lucas Ltd, the English Automotive
Electronics Manufacturer
has a reputation not entirely
untrue.
The Lucas factory motto: «Get home before dark.»
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Joe Lucas' last words: «Don't drive at night.»
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Lucas denies having invented the darkness, but they still claim the
«sudden, unexpected darkness».
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Lucas is the patent holder for the short circuit, inventors of the
first intermittent wiper and the self-dimming headlamp.
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The 3 position Lucas switch: Dim, Flicker
& Off.
The other 3 switch settings: Smoke, Smolder & Burn.
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The Original Anti-theft device: Lucas Electrics.
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If Lucas made guns, wars would not start either.
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It's not true that Lucas in 1947 tried to get Parliament to repeal
Ohm's law; they withdrew their efforts when they met too much resistance.
Did you hear about the guy who asked the owner of a Land Rover«How
can you tell one switch from another at night as they all look the same?" He
replied, «It does not matter which one you use, nothing happens!"
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Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone.
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Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb,
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Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.
Recommended procedure before taking on a repair of Lucas equipment:
Check the position of the stars, kill a chicken and walk three
times sun wise around your car chanting «Oh mighty Prince of Darkness
protect your unworthy servant.»
&
We fully understand why the Brits drink warm beer, they have Lucas
refrigerators.